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Posted by / 05-Oct-2017 21:35

Similarly, it’s inadvisable for an introverted person to try to force themselves to act like an extrovert, especially in the dating scene.

It’s incongruent with who they are; they’re quite literally pretending to be someone they’re not in hopes of better results.

On a practical level, desperation hurts you in a multitude of ways.

You’re less likely to meet someone you would consider you will be turned off when they realize that any warm body will do and still more will assume that there must be a reason why you’ve been refused so often.

The problem with this approach is that, frankly, that’s not .

Trying to be someone who is diametrically opposed to who you are inside is a recipe for frustration and failure.

After all, it’s likely that “being yourself” hasn’t exactly gotten you to where you want to be. When we look at people who have something we want – whether it be material success, a skill or talent or even just a hot girlfriend – it’s only natural to try to be more like them.

After all, when you’re coming off as desperate, you’re telling the everyone around you that you don’t care for them as a person so much as what they : a featureless mannikin dressed up in entitlement and frustrated desire.

Not only will others feel the unnaturalness of their pose, but the stress and strain of keeping up the act only serves to wear them down faster, leaving them drained and upset… Not everybody is built to be a club-hopping player – and yet that’s what PUA culture directs men towards.

Not everybody is cut out for traditional monogamy, for polyamory, for kink, for vanilla sex…

In short: your own desires are sabotaging your efforts to slake them.

As paradoxical as it may seem, you will never have better success at getting laid or finding a relationship by had it right: you get laid more by not trying.

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If you believe no woman could possibly find you attractive, you will elide over all evidence to the contrary – women flirting with you, giving you the “come-hither” stare or even just smiling at you – and focus like a laser on every incidence of negativity.